The God of Repentance

Today as I was praying through today’s Morning Office, one of the prayers really hit a cord with me.  It’s a passage from the Apocryphal Book the Prayer of Manasseh.  It says this:

And now, O Lord, I bend the knee of my heart, *
and make my appeal, sure of your gracious goodness.

I have sinned, O Lord, I have sinned, *
and I know my wickedness only too well.

Therefore I make this prayer to you: *
Forgive me, Lord, forgive me.

Do not let me perish in my sin, *
nor condemn me to the depths of the earth.

For you, O Lord, are the God of those who repent, *
and in me you will show forth your goodness.

This is Holy Week, the week we focus on the passion of our Lord as He was in Jerusalem, the week when we hone in on the cross and the price that the Lord paid for our freedom and forgiveness.

This can produce two emotions within us. First, a sense of great guilt and conviction.  Iunderstand this feeling. It was for me that Jesus came. It was for my sins He was given.  I was because of what I’ve done that He gave His life.  That is true for each of us.  He gave Himself for each of us.

That’s one reason, in my opinion, as Christians we must be forgiving, Jesus died for the sins of the world. But, also for my sins.  I don’t need to worry about what you are doing.  I need to worry about what I am doing. How am I living?  How am I being faithful.  How am I being who God has called me to be?  If we each live with that sense of awareness of our own sin, I imagine we’ll be more forgiving of each other’s sin.

The other emotion it produces is thankfulness. For, God is a God of repentance.  He is a God of those that turn to Him, that ask forgiveness.  That ask for new life. That turn away from the old.  That understand what they have done.

Today, God is a God that longs to forgive you. And me. He is a God that longs to offer each of us a fresh start. Today.  He longs to forgive us.

Repentance is a gift.  It allows us to make a new, fresh, and clean start.  Today.

And, repentance is not just for those that are not Christian.  It’s for each of us. For we all have sin and we all need to repent and turn away from it.  We all need to turn from our sin and turn to God.

Today, will you repent?  Will you turn away from your sin and turn to God?  Will you make a fresh start?  Will you have a new day?  God is the God of Repentance.  May we find His grace for that, even today.

Fool’s Gold

On of the suggested Psalms for this mornings prayer is Psalm 12:

1 Help me, LORD, for there is no godly one left; *
the faithful have vanished from among us.
2 Everyone speaks falsely with his neighbor; *
with a smooth tongue they speak from a double heart.
3 Oh, that the LORD would cut off all smooth tongues, *
and close the lips that utter proud boasts!
4 Those who say, “With our tongue will we prevail; *
our lips are our own; who is lord over us?”
5 “Because the needy are oppressed,
and the poor cry out in misery, *
I will rise up,” says the LORD,
“and give them the help they long for.”
6 The words of the LORD are pure words, *
like silver refined from ore
and purified seven times in the fire.
7 O LORD, watch over us *
and save us from this generation for ever.
8 The wicked prowl on every side, *
and that which is worthless is highly prized by everyone.

Sometimes as you are reading and praying through the scripture, just a phrase will pop out and stick with you. I’ve been taught that when that happens, pay special attention, that’s one of the ways that the Lord will speak to you through the reading of scripture.

Today, as I was reading this Psalm, the last verse stood out to me – “and that which is worthless is highly prized by everyone.”

That got me to thinking about what I prize.  About what I value.  About how I live, how I spend my time.

Is it worth wild?  In my life, am I chasing what really matters?  Am I spending my effort, my energy, my passion, on those things which are truly valuable?

Or am I spending my time chasing fool’s gold?  Am I spending my time chasing things which are fleeting?  Am I chasing my pride?  My ambition? Wealth?  Whatever.  Am I focusing on that which is worthless?  Or that which is eternal?

I think sometimes we find our lives empty because the things that we most chase are empty.

Today, what are you chasing? What are you after? What are you living for?  Is it really valuable?

The things of God are of priceless worth. They will not leave us empty. They will not leave us dry. They will not leave us alone. They are of amazing worth.

Today, do we chase that which is worthless?  Or do we chase that which is priceless.  My we spend our precious lives after that which truly matters.

Nobody Knows the Troubles I Face

Today’s New Testament reading, 2 Corinthians 1:1-7

Paul, an apostle of Christ Jesus by the will of God, and Timothy our brother, To the church of God that is in Corinth, including all the saints throughout Achaia: Grace to you and peace from God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ.

Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and the God of all consolation, who consoles us in all our affliction, so that we may be able to console those who are in any affliction with the consolation with which we ourselves are consoled by God. For just as the sufferings of Christ are abundant for us, so also our consolation is abundant through Christ. If we are being afflicted, it is for your consolation and salvation; if we are being consoled, it is for your consolation, which you experience when you patiently endure the same sufferings that we are also suffering.

Our hope for you is unshaken; for we know that as you share in our sufferings, so also you share in our consolation.

I get myself into the most trouble when I feel like my troubles are worse than anyone else.  I get myself into trouble I when I think I have worse than anyone else.

Surely know one knows what I’m going through.  Surely the suffering I face is worse than anyone. It’s not right, it’s not fair, it’s not the way it should be.

I deserve better.

And, since I’m having a tough time, it’s ok for me to fall back into old habits.  Old habits, old destructive things, they can be like an old pair of shoes. We fall back into them when we want that comfort.

No one knows the suffering I face.

But, here’s the thing that spoke to me in this text this morning.  What makes me think I won’t have troubles?  What makes me think I won’t have tough times?  Where in my mind did I get the impression that the Christian life would be without its problems and sufferings?

In fact, did Paul not say this morning that we are comforted in our sufferings so that we can comfort others?  Yes. We will face tough times. We will face troubles, trials, sufferings.

These things, these trials, they are not an excuse to turn from God.

They are a reason to turn to God.

Your troubles, your trials, your sleepless nights, they can either be an excuse for bitterness and old sin.  Or they can be a driving force to God.

It’s your call.

We were never promised a life without troubles.  It will come.  I don’t always respond as I should to those troubles.  It’s easy to feel sorry for yourself or feel alone.

Instead of praying.

We are comforted in our sufferings.  In our lowest moments, hardest times, loneliest day, may we turn to God.  The worse it is, the more we need to turn.

Don’t let the troubles turn you from God.  Today, may they turn us to God.

Being a Pastor versus Being a Son

I’ve had the chance the past few months to put on some different shoes.

As a pastor I’ve very used to the hospital.  I’ve spent time visiting in Jackson, in Memphis, in Tupelo and in nearly every every major hospital in Mississippi.

But, in past few months, I’ve had a different perspective.  My mom has had to undergo a couple of surgeries.  Nothing major, thankfully, but she’s been in the hospital more the past few months than at any point in my life.

And, mama is also 80.  I was raised by my grandparents (long story) and they are in great health. But, 80 is 80 and when she is put to sleep, I’ll be honest if you don’t start getting nervous.

So, for the first in my life, I’ve come to the hospital in a different position.  Not as a patient.  Not as a pastor. But, as a son.

I like being a pastor much, much better.

Maybe it’s just want I’m used to.  Now, there are advantages in being just a son. For instance, I didn’t shave today. Also, I’m wearing blue jeans and my favorite Ole Miss pull over.  I forgot my hat at home, or I’d be wearing a hat too.  So, I’m pretty comfortable.

And, there is that feeling about not worrying about others. When you are pastor, your concern is your church member. How are they?  Do they need anything?  Do you need to lift their spirits?  Pray?  Quote scripture?

Today, I’ve watched part of the Cotton Bowl, read the paper, checked my email. Blogged (what I’m doing right now).

I haven’t had to worry about providing care to anyone.

And, that’s the problem.  As a pastor, I have something to do.  A job.  A purpose.  I can be helpful.

As a son, I feel helpless.  Sure, I can pray like I always do.  I can stay busy.  I can do lots.  But, it’s different.

As a son, I wait.  I fret.  I worry.  I pace.

As a pastor, I’m calm and relaxed. Confident.

As a son.  I worry.

I really do love what I am called to do and who I’m called to be.  And, I know as a son the things that I know as a pastor.  I know God is at work, God is here, God’s grace is always there.

But, I get so busy taking care of others that I don’t have to worry about things myself.

And, perhaps, it’s not just preachers that do that. Perhaps we get so busy living life that we can forget to remember things we know.

God is good. God is at work. God is here, even know.

So, the pastor and son are not that different. And maybe, just maybe, we all have that same battle within us.

And, maybe, just maybe, God understands, knows, and loves us anyway.

Dry Spells and Voices

I’ve been going through a dry spell recently. Been really busy. I was a play a month or so ago, and that took a lot time. Of course church always keeps you pretty busy. And responsibilities within our Annual Conference. Family. Etc, etc, etc.

We’ve all been there, haven’t we? We’ve all had those moments in life where our souls just feel dry. Those times where we just don’t hear. Don’t see. Feel alone. I just have felt like my soul has been a little dry these past few weeks.

I’ve been watching the kids tonight. Holly is working late and I’ve just been hanging out with them. It’s been fun. We’ve been to McDonald’s and eaten more McNuggets than really anyone should eat. In a life time.

We’ve played. We’ve had fun.

As I watched the kids play in our small sandbox, I just started praying. God, I need to hear you now. I just need to hear your voice. I know you’re there. I believe. I have faith. But, I need to hear. I need a drink of water. My soul is dry.

And then I look at my kids. And I realized how lucky I am. How all I’ve been through in life, all the ways God has literally spared my life, all the ways He has given SO much more grace than I deserve, even at my best moment. And my life, like every one’s is not a collection of my best moments. I guess that’s why it’s grace. We could never deserve it.

And it just hit me. God has shown His love to me every moment of life. Every instant I’ve been alive, God has poured out grace upon grace. And the reason my soul has been so dry is because I haven’t taken time to water it.

Dr. Frank Pollard, former pastor of First Baptist Church, Jackson, MS may have been the greatest preacher I’ve ever heard. He used to say that prayer is the oxygen that feeds our souls. There is abundant oxygen for our souls. There is abundant water for our drought. There is amazing grace for this time.

We just have to allow God open our hearts. We have to allow Him to calm us, slow us, speak to us, and breathe in us. And fill us.

Today, the water is ready. The drought is over. Drink in. Nourish your soul. Life awaits.

Leadership

Tonight, I’ve been thinking about leadership, particularly within the church. I just heard the story of preacher somewhere within the state of Mississippi that did something so incredibly stupid that it made my head hurt.

This action made me mad for a a couple of reasons. But, the main was because this person had been given a group of souls by the church, but more importantly, by God, that he was supposed to take care of. And for some reason that I don’t understand, he didn’t.

Why? Why do people do dumb things? Why do people not see the results of their actions? I don’t know.

But, in truth we all do that. We all do dumb things. We all do not think through our actions. But, for most of us we have more common sense than the person I’m thinking about.

What does this have to do with leadership?At the core, I think leadership is about one thing. Trust. To lead Ripely FUMC, above all, my people have to trust me. They have to trust that God is leading me and that I’m listening to Him. They have to trust that I’m listening to them as well. That I value them. That I know God doesn’t just speak to me, but to all of us.

And sometimes, in fact most of the time, it’s not about what I teach others. It’s about what they can teach me.

And maybe that’s why this person did something terribly dumb. He thought He was the only source of wisdom. It was just him and God. And if the people didn’t listen to him, then they weren’t listening to God. He didn’t trust them. And, because of that, they didn’t trust him, and it all blew up.

Trust. It’s hard to earn. It’s easily lost. And without it, ministry, or any type of leadership is impossible. If we are going to lead, in whatever setting we are in, we have to earn the trust of others.

How? By valuing them. Loving them. Respecting them. Listening to them. Serving them. Know that we as the leader are not the only source of wisdom. Remembering that all wisdom come from God. And in that, they will trust. And we can lead.

Listening Sessions and Town Halls

I’ve been thinking a lot about how if we are not careful, any listening session, any conversation, any time we gather together around any hot button issues in our connection can turn into of the town halls we are seeing right now across the nation. Or can turn into the cable news shows that reduce conversation to WWE style wrestling matches. We have lost the ability as a nation, and seemingly, as a church, to discuss things in a loving Christian manner. I was thinking about this is as I saw this story today.

Towns halls gone wild: After going on for several days now, who looks worse in this town-halls-gone-wild story? An Obama administration that promised a new era of American politics, but that isn’t delivering on it? A Republican Party/conservative movement — less than seven months removed from the White House — stoking this anger and hoping it returns them to power? American citizens who can’t treat their neighbors or elected officials with respect, even when they disagree? Or a media covering the story but also amplifying the exaggerations and outright lies being told at these town halls? Ah, the classic political story … nobody wins, we’re all losers in these eyes of the true silent majority: the radical middle? To look at this debate through the prism of campaign politics, has anyone raised their POSITIVE ratings or simply succeeded in raising the NEGATIVE ratings of an opponent?

The ability for our country to have a constructive conversation is being lost, just like I see happening in the church. I think in the end, with all the yelling and angry talk, this radical center, this centrist view gets lost among the yelling and the entire Body is harmed. We’ve got to recapture the idea of Christian conversation. But I fear as I see the culture loosing this ability, the church may fall in line with culture, if we haven’t already.

Two of my favorite disciples are Simeon the Zealot and Matthew (the tax collector). Zealots and tax collectors didn’t get along. Zealots wanted to over throw the government and perhaps the only people they hated more than Rome were the tax collectors. And Matthew, was a tax collector. And both of these, these two that came from opposite sides of the street these two that had opposite opinions, opposite foundations, found unity in Christ.
Now we don’t know what they may have talked about on those dark night when the rest of the 12 were asleep. Maybe they yell, maybe they argued. But, we do know they were united in mission and love of Christ.
Can’t we as the church do that? Isn’t that what we should be about? Isn’t that who we are? We talk about being in the world, but not of the world. In the issue of our voices, if we are not careful, we are treading close to being of the world. And we are more than that.

Budgets, Church, and Change

I was at Rotary this past week here in Ripley and the president of the Mississippi School Board Association was giving a talk. It wasn’t the world’s most exciting talk (it is Rotary after all – and I love Rotary, but still). I was paying attention, but not too much, until he got to talking about the state budget is for Mississippi. Mississippi, like all states, is pretty much broke right now. The Governor is making huge cuts to that state budget right now and next year will be even worse. Folks smarter than I can argue about the politics and needs for all this, but the reality is is that it’s here and it’s something that our school districts will have deal with.

For instance, South Tippah, where my kids are in school, could stand to lose about a million dollars this year and potentially another two million next year. Those were numbers thrown out by the speaker, I can’t vouch for how true they are. Regardless, this district will lose a huge portion of it’s budget.

And it’s not just South Tippah. It will be other districts across the state, many of whom do not have big tax bases and the state money is the heart of their local budget. It’s going to be bad and have huge consequences for our teachers, administers, and students. But with the economy being what it is and revenues being down as much as they are, there doesn’t seem to be anything that can be done about it.

As most everything does, this got me to thinking about the Church. I always joke that nearly every subject gets me to thinking about the church. And just like the state, churches are seeing their “revenues” greatly decline. Locals churches are seeing it, and then churches like my own, the United Methodist Church, that are connectional are seeing connectional giving decline greatly. Within my Annual Conference, only a Herculean effort by churches at the end of last year saved our budget from being a complete disaster.

So, here we are. What is the problem? Is it simply a lack of revenue? One could argue that. But, let’s assume that the budget was paid 100% in full, both in the church and in the state. Are we still accomplishing our goal? Are our schools what they ought to be? In some places (South Tippah, for instance) things are pretty good. In others, in spite of the money, things are not as good as they should be.

Likewise, if the Annual Conference budget was paid in full, would that solve all the problems And I don’t mean financial ones, I mean problems with seeing folks coming a transforming relationship with Jesus? I mean problems making disciples for the transformation of the world? Is our problem in the church the budget? Or is it something greater than just the budget.

Now, that said, money makes it easier. Money, both for school and church makes both missions a lot, lot, lot easier. It’s a lot easier to worry about such things when you have all the money that you could possible need and want.

The speaker the other said something that stuck with me. Perhaps this crisis is forcing us to make hard decisions. Forcing us to see that our choices have consequences. If we want a certain thing, then we have to make choices and sacrifices and pay for it. And then we have to ask is it really worth it? Are the costs that we are incurring are they worth it and are they effective in accomplishing our goal.

This financial crisis is forcing us to ask questions. Who are we? What are we trying to do? Can we pay for what we are currently doing? Is what we are currently doing effective?

We are asking that in the state.

I hope we are asking that in the church.

Budgets shortfalls force us to make decisions and force us to look at things that can avoid in easier times. And often the choices are between doing things the way we’ve always done them because it’s the way we’ve always done them. We have a system, we have a pattern, we have a comfort zone. Maybe it’s not bringing about the desired goal, but “we’ve always done it this way.”

Or, the other choice could be doing something new. Doing something different. Looking things in a new way. All organizations, and most people, tend to just float on, not making changes or reflection upon where they are until it’s too late. As someone once said the only way we will change is when it’s more painful to stay the same.

I think in the state, and in the church, we have to ask ourselves, is the way that we’ve always done it, in terms of budgeting and spending our resources, is it working. Is it helping us accomplish our goals? Is is effective for the higher purpose?

Budgets force us to make choices.

For the church, the current financial reality says to us in short, we can’t stay the same. We can’t remain as we always are. We can’t do things as we always have. We can’t budget as we always have; we can’t do ministry as we always have. Put another way, we as the church have to stop doing ministry like it’s 1955.

It’s not 1955. We can’t go back. It will never be the same.

IT. WILL. NEVER. BE. THE. SAME.

It is what it is. We can either complain about it, long for it, and die away. Or we can roll up our sleeves, get to work, figure out what will work in 2010, and then, do that.

As the church, as the Body of Christ, we have not choice to move forward. In our local churches with tight budges and strained resources, we have to keep the main thing the main thing.

In our Annual Conference with even tighter budgets, we have look at what we are doing and ask ourselves, not is this good, but is it effective. It is accomplishing what we are called to do.

We can no longer do everything and be everything. We need to find our niche, find our calling, and then do that. We simply can’t afford to do things as we’ve always done them. This time of trial and crisis, it is a moment.

Will we stay the same? Or will we become something even greater. This is a moment to reflect, to change, to grow. We can do great things. Will we step up to the challenge.

The Inside Out Life

Today’s New Testament Reading from the Morning Office was 2 Corinthians 4: 1-12

Therefore, since it is by God’s mercy that we are engaged in this ministry, we do not lose heart. We have renounced the shameful things that one hides; we refuse to practice cunning or to falsify God’s word; but by the open statement of the truth we commend ourselves to the conscience of everyone in the sight of God. And even if our gospel is veiled, it is veiled to those who are perishing. In their case the god of this world has blinded the minds of the unbelievers, to keep them from seeing the light of the gospel of the glory of Christ, who is the image of God. For we do not proclaim ourselves; we proclaim Jesus Christ as Lord and ourselves as your slaves for Jesus’ sake. For it is the God who said, “Let light shine out of darkness,” who has shone in our hearts to give the light of the knowledge of the glory of God in the face of Jesus Christ. But we have this treasure in clay jars, so that it may be made clear that this extraordinary power belongs to God and does not come from us.

We are afflicted in every way, but not crushed; perplexed, but not driven to despair; persecuted, but not forsaken; struck down, but not destroyed; always carrying in the body the death of Jesus, so that the life of Jesus may also be made visible in our bodies. For while we live, we are always being given up to death for Jesus’ sake, so that the life of Jesus may be made visible in our mortal flesh. So death is at work in us, but life in you.

I like the notion in this that faith is an inside out thing. It starts with the inside.  No matter what is happening on the outside, no matter what is happening in your life, no matter what is happening today, faith starts inside.

Life starts inside.

I find in my own life, I pay more attention to the outside stuff.  I pay more attention to the things of this world, or to my fears, or to my hurts, my wants, my concerns.

I don’t pay enough attention to the soul.  To the life. To what matters.

No matter what happens today, life is at work in your. Through Jesus. Through the Spirit, life is at work in you.

Are you seeking it?  Are you listening to it?  Are you living inside out?  If we live outside in, where the external determines how our soul feels, we are in trouble.

If, though, our soul determines our external, we will find life, no matter what.  That’s what Paul tells us today. We are merely clay jars, that have this awesome life within.

Today, where is your life?  Today, what do you pay the most attention to? Today, what are you living for.  May we live the inside out life.